I have read all of your books and you're wonderful and they're wonderful. I'm 54. I never speak to anyone on my birthday except my husband (I used to have one) and now my boyfriend. Everyone else can blow me.
I LOVED this Ask Molly, it's my favorite. I know I have probably said this for other Ask Mollys and Ask Polly, but omg, I LOVED this! And Happy Birthday!!! I also had a recent birthday and I could SOOO feel this in my bones, hahaha! Rock on, and wishing you many more birthdays to come!
I loved this. I once told a boyfriend that I cry on my birthday every year and he thought I meant joyful tears! LOL, no, I told him. He was determined to try to keep it from happening that year! But then the special new croissant place we went to had the worst fucking croissants and then the air quality went to 200 and I had to go home instead of to this thing that I insisted he should go to without me "IT'S TOTALLY FINE, I'LL SEE YOU LATER" - and just like that, before fucking 10am: tears on my couch.
Yeah! When will they fucking learn, I think every year. Schedule my entire day with delights! Meanwhile, what I SAY in weeks leading up to it: “No biggie, anything will be fun. Maybe some perfume? No, perfume is impossible to pick. Maybe one of those giant water bottles with a built-in straw?”
HAHAHA oh god, exactly. "Maybe just some of yesterday's pasta? Whatever, maybe not pasta. Anything will be fun. But maybe not pasta, or pasta. Let's talk about it later."
The birthday struggle is real... and for Godssake DON’T call me on my birthday. I would NEVER answer. Fuck 53. Fuck 43! (That’s how old I am.) But I did read your book! The newest one. It had me LOLing all over the stationary bike, the airplane, the bathroom. Thanks for doing that thing.
So busy today I almost missed your fucking birthday - fuck! Not that I actually would remember your birthday, but one of my friends has a birthday tomorrow, so thanks for reminding me, so I can forget it tomorrow and say, but I remembered it the day before yesterday, and also I remembered it four weeks ago when he called me to let me know his dad died. "Foreverland" is great but everyone here knows that because YOU Molly, you wrote that fanfuckingtastic book. Happy fanfuckingtastic birthday!
Happy birthday to a fucking goddess! Your writing brings out my best laughs and wails. So for my upcoming birthday, I just bought 2 of your books! Can’t wait, especially for Foreverland. I have been thinking on the weirdness of lifelong partnership and so excited to hear your insights. ❤️🦥
Happy 53 from 53 and 5 months! God damn RIGHT you get one day a year to be a beautiful perfect fairy princess with Fate and Circumstance waiting on you hand and foot! I 100% feel like I should not be reduced to dinner at Jersey Mikes on the HOLIEST DAY WHEN I WAS FUCKING BORN! The other 364 days I will eat shit and abnegate myself into a fine powder but today I want MY WAY!
Btw the best birthday gift I got was on my 50th when I was served my divorce papers, forever stamped with my natal holiday. He was no Bill, that’s for sure. I read Foreverland, and all of Suck, too!
I feel this hard. Today sucked. This week sucked. It was a week of frustrating suckitude. I want to print this column I can read it every hour or so next week because CLEARLY WE DESERVE FOR THINGS TO GO OKAY SOMETIMES, SERIOUSLY WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH THE WORLD. Besides everything.
(Oh wait, I don’t own a printer anymore and trying to pick one on Amazon is just too much. Well. Fuck.)
One year I decided that my birthday job was to make sure everyone had a good time, because it was about them and only for pretend about me. I decided that my perfect birthday day would have to be another time, maybe one less fraught with pressure to bring a HallDismarkney fantasy to life.
This gives me life. I'll be turning 50 this year. Screw the weight of expectations but also, I will expect princess jubilee vibes from everyone for the month previous and after. Happy belated!
Hi Heather, I've upgraded to a paid subscription. Happy Birthday. I turn 53 this year too. Love you're writing. You're keeping it real. I really only began enjoying my birthday after divorce when I began buying my own presents. So thoughtfully chosen each and every one. Anyway if your husband vacuums then from my point of view you are living the dream. I only do 'Swedish Death' vacuuming now in this second half of my life, which is to say that I consider it a gift for those I leave behind.
I have read all of your books and you're wonderful and they're wonderful. I'm 54. I never speak to anyone on my birthday except my husband (I used to have one) and now my boyfriend. Everyone else can blow me.
I LOVED this Ask Molly, it's my favorite. I know I have probably said this for other Ask Mollys and Ask Polly, but omg, I LOVED this! And Happy Birthday!!! I also had a recent birthday and I could SOOO feel this in my bones, hahaha! Rock on, and wishing you many more birthdays to come!
I loved this. I once told a boyfriend that I cry on my birthday every year and he thought I meant joyful tears! LOL, no, I told him. He was determined to try to keep it from happening that year! But then the special new croissant place we went to had the worst fucking croissants and then the air quality went to 200 and I had to go home instead of to this thing that I insisted he should go to without me "IT'S TOTALLY FINE, I'LL SEE YOU LATER" - and just like that, before fucking 10am: tears on my couch.
And every year before, and every year since!
Happy Birthday <3
Yeah! When will they fucking learn, I think every year. Schedule my entire day with delights! Meanwhile, what I SAY in weeks leading up to it: “No biggie, anything will be fun. Maybe some perfume? No, perfume is impossible to pick. Maybe one of those giant water bottles with a built-in straw?”
HAHAHA oh god, exactly. "Maybe just some of yesterday's pasta? Whatever, maybe not pasta. Anything will be fun. But maybe not pasta, or pasta. Let's talk about it later."
Ha! We are insane.
The birthday struggle is real... and for Godssake DON’T call me on my birthday. I would NEVER answer. Fuck 53. Fuck 43! (That’s how old I am.) But I did read your book! The newest one. It had me LOLing all over the stationary bike, the airplane, the bathroom. Thanks for doing that thing.
Foreverland is so good, I told my therapist to read it hahaha.
So busy today I almost missed your fucking birthday - fuck! Not that I actually would remember your birthday, but one of my friends has a birthday tomorrow, so thanks for reminding me, so I can forget it tomorrow and say, but I remembered it the day before yesterday, and also I remembered it four weeks ago when he called me to let me know his dad died. "Foreverland" is great but everyone here knows that because YOU Molly, you wrote that fanfuckingtastic book. Happy fanfuckingtastic birthday!
Happy birthday to a fucking goddess! Your writing brings out my best laughs and wails. So for my upcoming birthday, I just bought 2 of your books! Can’t wait, especially for Foreverland. I have been thinking on the weirdness of lifelong partnership and so excited to hear your insights. ❤️🦥
Happy 53 from 53 and 5 months! God damn RIGHT you get one day a year to be a beautiful perfect fairy princess with Fate and Circumstance waiting on you hand and foot! I 100% feel like I should not be reduced to dinner at Jersey Mikes on the HOLIEST DAY WHEN I WAS FUCKING BORN! The other 364 days I will eat shit and abnegate myself into a fine powder but today I want MY WAY!
Btw the best birthday gift I got was on my 50th when I was served my divorce papers, forever stamped with my natal holiday. He was no Bill, that’s for sure. I read Foreverland, and all of Suck, too!
Happy birthday!
I feel this hard. Today sucked. This week sucked. It was a week of frustrating suckitude. I want to print this column I can read it every hour or so next week because CLEARLY WE DESERVE FOR THINGS TO GO OKAY SOMETIMES, SERIOUSLY WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH THE WORLD. Besides everything.
(Oh wait, I don’t own a printer anymore and trying to pick one on Amazon is just too much. Well. Fuck.)
One year I decided that my birthday job was to make sure everyone had a good time, because it was about them and only for pretend about me. I decided that my perfect birthday day would have to be another time, maybe one less fraught with pressure to bring a HallDismarkney fantasy to life.
Happy birthday beautiful birthday princess. ❤️
This gives me life. I'll be turning 50 this year. Screw the weight of expectations but also, I will expect princess jubilee vibes from everyone for the month previous and after. Happy belated!
Hi Heather, I've upgraded to a paid subscription. Happy Birthday. I turn 53 this year too. Love you're writing. You're keeping it real. I really only began enjoying my birthday after divorce when I began buying my own presents. So thoughtfully chosen each and every one. Anyway if your husband vacuums then from my point of view you are living the dream. I only do 'Swedish Death' vacuuming now in this second half of my life, which is to say that I consider it a gift for those I leave behind.
damn. your writing